Strawberry
"Strawberry was a must for this album. As I was in the planning phase I always knew this song needed to be here because it told a very particular story from my life. As a kid entering middle school I met my very first crush, and this song tells the story of how I fell into a spiral of self-doubt and judgement as I tried to convince this boy to love me. In the end I learned that not every relationship is meant to be, and that I couldn't put my worth on whether or not a boy liked me."
Monarch
"Monarch came later on in the writing process, being written in early 2023. Throughout my childhood I experience a lot of bullying, something I expand upon in later songs. This song in particular is based around an experience I had in which a boy who bullied me in late elementary school caught and killed a monarch butterfly by putting it in his locker simply to upset me. The hardest thing when it comes to bullying is understanding that they only do it because they're struggling to find something to love in themselves. Here, I take the perspective of the butterfly, passing kind and calm judgement on those who had wronged me."
Lemonade
"Lemonade was the first song I finished for the album and means the most to me personally. It's the song that made me start writing Spectrum in the first place. Lemonade is about growing up and having to leave behind your childhood, losing friends and seeing the world change around you. I wanted the song to end on a happy note, as I personally have always had a hard time leaving the past behind and I wanted to be encouraging to kids and teens who may be going through the same experience as they grow up, move schools, or graduate."
Curse of Caring
"Curse of Caring elaborates on the bullying I experienced growing up, as well as on some other relationships that affected me negatively as I made and lost friends. This is the darker side of Lemonade, reflecting on how maybe the past wasn't as perfect as I remembered it. Each verse tells the story of a person I met, loved, and grew apart from for one reason or another."
Devil In Blue
"Devil In Blue is all about self-acceptance and not being afraid to be who you are and stand up for what you believe in. Throughout my teenage years I have leaned in a more spiritual direction and feel a deep connection with the Earth and the universe around me. For this, I have been mocked and ridiculed. This song is my way of taking back my power and declaring that I am a spiritual being and will be free to live my life as I please."
Constellation
"Constellation is about my experience with grief. The idea of the song first arose following the passing of my Great Grandmother in 2019. The concept that the song follows of souls becoming stars in the night sky is something I once told a friend at a very young age to comfort her when her grandfather passed away. We were sitting by the window and I pointed up at the sky. "Do you see that star? The brightest one? I think that's him." After my great grandmother passed that same sentiment brought me great comfort knowing she was still watching over me and guiding me every time I looked up at the night sky."
Obsession
"Obsession is the oldest song on the album, with the lyrics having been written all the way back in 2019. The full song wasn't produced, however, until 2023 because the song had been floating around in my mind for so long that nothing sounded right. This song is about sacrificing yourself for people who don't respect you, expecting them to love you in return, that being a romantic partner, a friend, or even a family member. I often find myself trying so hard to please others, and this song is a reminder that not everyone is going to love and you and that's okay. You don't need to destroy yourself just to get someone else's approval."
Sugar
"Sugar tells the love story between me and my partner. Throughout the beginning of our relationship we were constantly threatened to be separated by family and friends who didn't believe in our happiness. Despite all the hurdles we had to jump over and a pandemic separating us for the entire beginning of our relationship, we still love each other deeply and are looking forward to a bright future together."
Bunny
"Bunny is another song that is particularly important to me. Although every song in this album is a tool for me to release trauma and move forward, this song is the heaviest. Bunny is about being treated as a sex-object, as though you aren't a human being with a mind and a heart. When everything you do is sexualized, it's easy to feel like a rabbit being chased by a pack of hungry wolves."
Vampire
"Vampire is a follow up to Bunny still following the idea of being seen as a sex-object, only this time it's referring to the people who judge you or call you lesser than for looking the way that you do or expressing your sexuality. I've never felt as though I had the right to dress the way I wanted or express my love the way I wanted. Not everything I do needs to be about sex, but when it's my own decision I don't deserve to be burned at the stake for it."
Spectrum
"The final song on the album is a culmination of every song that came before it, representing my journey through the first 18 years of my life, and how now I'm stepping into a brand new chapter. I've been through all of these things, experienced the pain, learned the lessons, and survived."